Wednesday, November 30, 2022

Hostess Lemon Drizzle Baby Bundts


 Hostess Lemon Drizzle Baby Bundts are moist little lemon cakes that go oh so very well with coffee. I always look for things to have with coffee because I keep my red dragon Venus fly trap over my coffee maker to keep it warm. They love the heat. 

Anyway, I absolutely  love these things. They are wonderful little mouthfuls of joy that I will never buy again, because I'm a giant fat man who should never eat these things. Being fat sucks.

Tuesday, November 29, 2022

Hostess Pumpkin Spice Twinkies


 There is almost no pumpkin spice in these Hostess Pumpkin Spice Twinkies. I mean, I can tell they are not just Twinkies but the flavor is so mild it gets lost. I've never liked Twinkies all that much but they keep coming out with new flavors. It's like, 'here, fat man, die by eating these flavorless cakes.'

Monday, November 28, 2022

Popcornopolis Hot Cocoa Popcorn


 Popcornopolis Hot Cocoa Popcorn is some good stuff. I don't know if I'd say it tastes like hot cocoa, but I will say I went through the first bag and had to bring the second bag to work to stop myself from eating it all. 

Popcorn can be so very delicious, and I have no understanding of why. Or is it just that I'm a big fat dude who can't stop eating. 

Sunday, November 27, 2022

Keebler Fudge Stripes Gingerbread Cookies


 Keebler Fudge Stripes Gingerbread Cookies are one of those things that just don't have enough ginger. I mean, a good gingerbread cookie is going to wake you up enough to make it another mile or so in the snow.

These are fine, but they just don't ginger at me all that much. If you're a health nut who normally doesn't have any sugar these will knock you on your butt. As for me, they're okay.

Saturday, November 26, 2022

Junior Mints Peppermint Crunch


 Junior Mints Peppermint Crunch do not crunch when you eat them. Well, may be a little but not enough for it to be in the name. I think they have more of a kick than good old Junior Mints, but then I really don't eat Junior Mints to be honest.

Friday, November 25, 2022

Albertsons Fresh Baked Pumpkin Muffins


 Albertsons Fresh Baked Pumpkin Muffins may just be on your radar this holiday season, and I can say they are really not that great. They are not pumpkin spice, they are just pumpkin. Being just pumpkin they really haven't much of a flavor at all. 

Pumpkin as an ingredient makes things moist. These are moist enough, I guess, but they just don't taste like much.

Fail. 

Thursday, November 24, 2022

Jelly Belly Holiday Favorites Cranberry Sauce

Jelly Belly Holiday Favorites Cranberry Sauce Jelly Beans are more raspberry than cranberry and lack the tart nature of the berry that gives it its distinctive flavor. If what you really want is cranberry sauce on the go this will simply not do.

I have to admit I don't have much love for cranberry sauce myself but these beans just fall short.
 

Wednesday, November 23, 2022

Idahoan Loaded Baked Mashed Potatoes

 

Idahoan Loaded Baked Mashed Potatoes have a funny kind of name for mashed potatoes. I mean, so you baked them after you mashed them? Well, I love spuds anyway. These are a bit better than just plane old mashed potatoes so I have to admit that they are worth buying. They have more flavor and texture than most instant mashed potatoes I've had. 

Truth is that if you want mashed potatoes and you don't want to work for them these are a great option. Will buy again.

 

Tuesday, November 22, 2022

Fireball Non Alcoholic Cinnamon Holiday Nog


 Fireball Non Alcoholic Cinnamon Holiday Nog is a product that I had to try out of simple curiosity. I mean, I don't get it. Why would you have non alcoholic fireball of any kind?

I guess if one of my dry friends came over I would be able to give this to them if they were not also lactose intolerant or perhaps vegan. It is always hard to have a vegan option on hand. 

In any case, this stuff tastes like it shouldn't be a thing. Not bad, mind you, just like it shouldn't be a thing.

Monday, November 21, 2022

Yoplait Starburst Strawberry Flavor

Yoplait Starburst Strawberry tastes just like Starburst. I mean, I haven't had a starburst in a long time, but this tasted like Starburst Strawberry. If you like Starburst this is a must buy for you. I have never known anyone who loves Starburst that much, but in this world this just makes sense.
 

Sunday, November 20, 2022

Near East Herbed Chicken Couscous Mix

Near East Herbed Chicken Couscous Mix is a product that most people I know would only have for variety. It's much like rice only dry and more sand like so that you need more water to get it down. 

The good part of this is that it adds something different to the table but once you pass that mark you have to admit there is nothing all that interesting about couscous. 

If your having a dinner party this is an easy way to add some cultures to your meal, and it can even be a good conversation piece. Just be ready for the bad jokes about only one cous because someone is on a diet.

Saturday, November 19, 2022

Jelly Belly Holiday Favorites Pumpkin Pie


 I may not know Jelly Beans but I know Pumpkin Pie and Jelly Belly Holiday Favorites Pumpkin Pie disappoints on many levels. From the fake cinnamon to the lack of other flavors what's not to dislike. Even the color is more tuned to sweet potato pie over pumpkin. 

You'd think a blob like me would love anything with sugar in it but these just don't tickle me. 

Friday, November 18, 2022

Seattle Chocolate Hot Buttered Rum Truffle Bar

I have never been one to pay five dollars for a chocolate bar but in these modern times I think that's an okay price now. That said, Seattle Chocolate Hot Buttered Rum Truffle Bar isn't all that hot, buttered, or rum so far as I can tell. 

The toffee pieces are the standout giving the bar a long and wonderful aftertaste. To be honest, this is more of a novelty in chocolate than it is better than a normal bar. If you want to support a woman owned business Seattle Chocolate is proud to be one.   

I like the idea of environmentally friendly chocolate, which is another reason Seattle Chocolate is a fine company to buy from, but I shouldn't be eating chocolate. In addition, unless you folks read more of my blog entries I really can't afford this stuff. 

Thursday, November 17, 2022

Western Bagel 100% Whole Wheat Bagels


 Western Bagel 100% Whole Wheat Bagels are bagels. Not great and not terrible. Given the whole wheat thing I guess that makes them just a little better. As a big fat dude you know I love bagels, and these hold the line. 

Good job sort of healthy bagel.

Wednesday, November 16, 2022

Hostess Iced Pumpkin CupCakes


 Hostess Iced Pumpkin CupCakes are nice little cupcakes that are moist and soft and full of cream. These are hear to be festive and give you another seasonal thing to have with your coffee. 

These are good to have with your coffee. I love coffee and I'm glad to have these around, because I love any reason to have coffee.

Tuesday, November 15, 2022

Seattle Chocolate Winter Orange Spice Truffle Bar


 Seattle Chocolate is the kind of posh, woman owned, good to the environment chocolate company that makes bars that are really good. As in good I mostly mean high quality. The Winter Orange Spice Truffle Bar is a complex flavored chocolate fit for those of you who eat chocolate only when it will lead you to climax. 

I have to admit that the orange overtones really stand out and complement the chocolate. I can't really taste the spice, but then I'm a big blob and shouldn't eat chocolate anyway. 

Monday, November 14, 2022

Promised Land Dairy’s Limited Edition Old-Fashioned Nog


 Promised Land Dairy’s Limited Edition Old-Fashioned Nog is a creamy winter delight that I shouldn't have because I'm the blob. 

Is this all that better than any other eggnog? No, it's good, good enough to buy and enjoy, but not earth shatteringly good. 

I will buy this again if I come across it, but I will not go looking for it.

Sunday, November 13, 2022

Maplehurst Bakeries Pumpkin Pie

Maplehurst Bakeries Pumpkin Pie is not that pumpkin flavored. I mean, tastes fine, but it's more the mild side of whatever you may have it with. If you toss some whipped cream on top of this then it will be so much better. 

Not a bad pie by any means, but not the greatest pie int he world. 
 

Saturday, November 12, 2022

Friendly Farms Maple Vanilla Whipped Dairy Topping

Friendly Farms Maple Vanilla Whipped Dairy Topping is a thing that shows up at your ALDI market this time of year and brings the flavor of maple into your cocoa. 

I really only got this to review it, I don't really eat this kind of stuff. Stop laughing, I mean it, not every manblob eats whipped cream. 

As whipped cream like things go, I think this is really good, not that I would know. 
 

Friday, November 11, 2022

Annie's Pizza Poppers Uncured Pepperoni


 Annie's Pizza Poppers Uncured Pepperoni are the kind of thing I like to nuke until they are crunchy. There is something wrong with me but these aren't bad. I'm not saying they're as good as pizza but these are good. They make a good snack. Two thumbs up... or is that two chins? I hate being a fat man.

Thursday, November 10, 2022

Hostess Honey Bun Iced Latte


 Hostess Honey Bun Iced Latte sounds so good. I mean, this is the feeling you get when someone says they got you a Star Wars figure and you find out it's Jar Jar. You're like, 'well'.

I mean, Hostess Honey Bun Iced Lattes aren't bad. They taste fine, but you would never say 'this reminds me of honey buns' when you drink them. They would be a whole lot better if you drank them with the honey bun they are named for, and that's kind of how you feel about Jar Jar. 

I mean, if you just had Jar Jar that would stink but if you had Jar Jar with other Star Wars toys it can be fun. Let's say you have a droid giving Jar Jar an enema. Now that would be fun.  

Hostess makes some of the most iconic snacks in the world, but their latte game is so average that it blends in with the background and you don't know it's there.

Wednesday, November 9, 2022

Terry's Orange Milk Chocolate Bar


 Terry's Orange Milk Chocolate Bar is a funny sort of chocolate. I never understood the whole chocolate and orange thing, but I have to admit that it works. I guess chocolate is very versatile. 

In any case, this is a fine product that will bring joy to most people who come across it. I thought it was kind of odd but admit that it was very good.

Tuesday, November 8, 2022

The Collaborative Double Chocolate Mousse


 I had no idea that The Collaborative Double Chocolate Mousse was plant based until I sat down to write this review and noticed it on the label. That's the best way to try this kind of food. Not knowing it's different before trying it is a fair way to try things. 

The Collaborative tastes like the real deal to me.  It's rich and chocolaty and taste like something a fat monster like me should never eat. How can this taste so good and make me feel so bad about myself.

Monday, November 7, 2022

Trader Joe’s Sweet And Savory Lightly Spiced Pumpkin Spread


 Trader Joe’s Sweet And Savory Lightly Spiced Pumpkin Spread brings me to the thoughts of lazy days on a sunny far. I can picture that easily in my head as I spread this stuff on my biscuits and drink my tea. 

I don't know why. I have never had these experiences. I have honestly never known lazy days where I wasn't stuck in bed from some malady. 

In other words, this spread is some kind of a remnant of better times, or the perception of better times, because days were long on that far, and work was hard.

Sunday, November 6, 2022

Pringles Salt & Vinegar


 If the pungent taste of vinegar is a big thing for you than Pringles Salt and Vinegar may be too mild for your tastes. I have never understood why they have to add the salt in the title. I thought all crisps were salted.

In any case, I eat too many of these as it is but this flavor isn't better than any other I've tried, and it just kind of exists. I would say that you shouldn't shy away from these but don't go looking for them. Original Pringles are as good if not better.  

Saturday, November 5, 2022

Truly Grass Fed Natural Creamy Irish Butter, Salted


'Truly Grass Fed Natural Creamy Irish Butter, Salted' just tastes like butter to me. I don't really know how butter can be Irish and I'm not sure how it can impact the flavor but I guess you feel better knowing that the cow got some fresh air. 

You ever see, or smell, a dairy farm? Cows poop all the time and they then walk through the other cows poop. They get poop on their utters and so there is poop in their milk. 

Grass fed cows step in their poop a good deal less so you get less of it in their milk and I think they poop a bit less because grass takes longer to digest. Overall, you can feel better about eating this butter and know there is less poop in it. 

Enjoy!

Friday, November 4, 2022

Pillsbury Grands! Homestyle Biscuits, Butter Tastin


 These are the Butter Tastin Pillsbury Grands Homestyle Biscuits. Well, they don't feel so grand to a four hundred pound monster like me. I did drop to three eighty but that's not enough to make these feel big. 

They come in an eight pack, and I can't eat all eight, but four is good enough. I've had these with jelly and I've had these in my sausage biscuit. I have to say they work just fine. Not sure what they mean by butter tastin' but I guess if I tried the originals I would know. 

Now I just got to try those originals. 

Thursday, November 3, 2022

Maplehurst Pecan Pie


 Maplehurst Pecan Pie is a nice little thing to have on your table this holiday season. I love pecan pie, I mean, I'm a big fat dude so clearly I do love pecan pie a little too much. This isn't the best pecan pie I've ever had, but it is very good.

Wednesday, November 2, 2022

La Brea Bakery Seeded Sourdough Rolls


 Someone forgot the sour on these La Brea Bakery Seeded Sourdough Rolls. They are easy and fast with a nice crunch to their crust, but they taste like nothing. It didn't help that I had them with unsalted butter, but what you spread on these rolls will really impact how much you like them. 

This is the time of year to have a dinner party, and these will add a bit of class, but in the end disappoint your guests. How do you fail with rolls?!

Tuesday, November 1, 2022

Delacre Tentation Chocolate Cookies


 Delacre Tentation Chocolate Cookies are a fine thing to have with coffee. I love coffee and I think these just go great with it. In truth all that was missing was a friend with a cup of coffee to have these with. 

Yes, the best thing to have with a cup of coffee will always be a friend with a cup of coffee, and these cookies are a great thing to have with a friend. 

As for me, I'm too fat to eat them on my own so sharing them is the best idea save not eating them to start with.