Kirkland Signature Organic Orange Juice

Kirkland Signature Organic Orange Juice is orange juice that settles at the bottom. I mean, it's find just give it a shake.

RC Burgers (South Gate) Fresa Shake

Fresa just means strawberry. This Fresa Shake at RC Burgers South Gate tastes like almost nothing. It's not as good as a soda.

Kirkland Signature Einstein Brothers Bagels Everything Bagel

It is somewhat annoying that Kirkland Signature is stamped on my Einstein Brothers Bagels. I had no idea this was a bagle I could get at places other than Costco and looking at what kind of bagles are on offer in store makes me feel like I can do better than this. 

Then again, my Nimh likes them so that's good enough for me.  

Then again, all that stuff on them can just get everywhere. 

Sonic Drive-In Cheese Sauce

Sonic Drive-In Cheese Sauce has the consistency of yogurt. It tastes okay but isn't that much better than the pretzel I put it on. I'd use this for Sonic's tots before its twists. 

Rip It Energy Fuel Citrus X

Rip It Energy Fuel Citrus X tastes like orange juice and goes well with vodka. It won't keep you up at night, but, well, vodka. 

Otis Spunkmeyer Chocolate Chunk Cookies

Otis Spunkmeyer Chocolate Chunk Cookies kick some massive tail. I mean, I love these with a cup of coffee. This cookie is so good it can kick a blue whale's rear end. Super win.

San Luis Sourdough

San Luis Sourdough is filled with air pockets and holes. It's the swish cheese of bread. In fact when I got two slices to eat to refresh my memory for this review they fell apart before I got them in the toaster. Still, delivers on the sour so that's good.

RC Burgers (South Gate) Chili Cheese Fries

RC Burgers (South Gate) Chili Cheese Fries were hot and soggy. I mean, if the fries had been fresh this would have kicked real tail, but they weren't so this was a mess. I didn't finish it, but then I had indigestion.

Snack Pack Unicorn Magic

Snack Pack Unicorn Magic is the kind of thing that I would expect to find at a sex shop that services girly gay men. I'm not judging, this just looks like something no one should ever put in their mouth unless they're doing something, well, odd.

 Who wants to eat artificially flavored unicorn vomit in the first place? It also comes with a free unicorn stick on tattoo, because every dad wants to give a stick on tattoo to his little girl right? 

 I mean, if this were the 80's it would be okay for me to make gay jokes about this product. Not so much any more, but if a man had a unicorn tattoo you'd think he was gay. 

Also, this doesn't taste very good. Kind of fruity but not very. 

Sonic Honey Mustard

Sonic Honey Mustard is your run of the mill honey mustard with nothing to make it stand out from any other of it's kind. It goes with Sonic selling kind of just there food to people who don't want to get out of their car but have the forethought not to drive and eat.

Sonic Drive-In Chili Cheese Fries

Sonic Drive-In Chili Cheese Fries are so meh that I think the normal fries are actually better. I mean, not enough chili and that isn't real cheese. Fail.

Sonic Drive-In Red Bull Slush

I know I ordered a Red Bull Slush at Sonic Drive-In but I'm not sure that was what they got me. It didn't taste like Red Bull and wasn't red. Then I haven't had Red Bull since it came out so I don't know.

Stuff gave me a brain freeze right off. If you're looking for super cold this is good. If you want to get pumped up this didn't do that much for me.

Sonic Drive-In Grilled Cheese

Sonic Drive-In sells a grilled cheese sandwich. It is a poorly made grilled cheese sandwich in that they use no butter on the bread and so has little of the nature of the real deal.

Also, I think that is cheese spread not real cheese. Still, I mean, it was okay. I wouldn't get it again. 

Sonic Drive-In Jumbo Popcorn Chicken

Sonic Drive-In Jumbo Popcorn Chicken is very chicken but not enough jumbo. I mean, does that look all that jumbo to you. I guess it was big for popcorn but not for popcorn chicken. 

In any case, stuff is okay, not great, but okay. I wouldn't turn my nose up to it, but I'm not looking forward to more. 

Little Caesars Cheese Bread

Little Caesars Cheese Bread is bland and greasy. It tasted like nothing, but had a good mouthfeel. If it wasn't all nasty and got all over my hands then I would have really liked this stuff. It just needs more flavor...and less grease. 

Little Caesars

It's been twenty years since my last Little Caesars Pizza and I wasn't missing anything. These things leave a funny taste in my mouth. I think it's baking powder to make them rise more. You look at that pizza and say "how can that be a fail?" but some how it was. 

Then came the bad dreams after eating this too close to bedtime. I had a dream something was trying to crawl in my butt. It turned out that it was just that I had fallen asleep with my wallet in my pants. 

Sonic Drive-In Soft Pretzel Twist

The Sonic Drive-In Soft Pretzel Twist is the kind of thing you'd get at a movie theater. I mean, these things are great I'm just not sure why they're at a fast food place. I have to be honest that I don't know of any other place that cells them outside of the movies and such so I like the fact that they are on offer. Great twist, I would buy this again.

Sonic Drive-In Fries

Sonic Drive-In Fries are Fries. They didn't bring me ketchup. I mean, why would you eat these without ketchup. Anyway, nothing to see here. People just move along.

Sonic Drive-In SuperSONIC Bacon Double Cheeseburger

Sonic Drive-In SuperSONIC Bacon Double Cheeseburger is a solid try at an American classic. What could be more American than an artery clogging mess. 

I like this burger but there is nothing really out there to say about the thing. I mean, great job, how could you do any less. I'm glad it's not made of hedgehog. 

Sonic Drive-In Mozzarella Sticks

Sonic Drive-In Mozzarella Sticks are your typical seasoned Mozzarella Sticks. There is nothing too interesting about them and if you've hat them at places like AMC or got them at the store then you've had these.  

I mean, I love them, but they're just like every other Mozzarella Stick I've had. 

Sonic Drive-In Footlong Chili Cheese Coney

At Sonic Drive-In this is the Footlong Chili Cheese Coney. It looks good, but there is so little chilly the fork they give you is almost a joke. The whole thing wasn't hot enough to feel properly cooked, and that cheese isn't very good. 

To make matters worse, the bun got soggy fast and the hot dog fell out of it.  This dog looks so good, but fails so hard.

Sonic Drive-In Tots

A few days ago Sonic was a blue thing that nerds played with and a sign I saw on my way to work every night. Then I stopped by and found that they were a burger place with 'Tots'. Who eats these things past the crappy school lunches we had back in the days of number two pencils?

I've never been a big fan of the tater tot and even now ask myself if someone came up with these as a result of having bits of potato left over that didn't fit in other things. 

To be honest, these are, well, just kind of there. They fill you up all right but taste like kind of nothing and are not as good as french fries. Stick with the fries. 

 

Original Ripple Nutritious Plant-Based Half & Half with DHA Ormega-3s

Original Ripple Nutritious Plant-Based Half & Half with DHA Ormega-3s will never be mistaken for the real thing. It's not to say this is a bad product and if you're going vegan this will do just fine. Still, you can tell it's not cow juice right off and that's it's failing. It's a little chalky but okay.

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers Sweet Tea

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers Sweet Tea tastes like Lipton. It's not bad. I mean, I like it and would drink it again. Not much to say about it after that. 

 

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers Slaw

I'm not eating that crap, but I'll show you what it looks like if you want to try it.

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers Cane's Sauce

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers Cane's Sauce covered the nasty ash taste of the bad chicken. I mean, I can't say I'd try it on other things or that I would want to dip the fries in it, but it did it's job well. Thumbs of more making nasty chicken less nasty.

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers

Raising Cane's does Chicken Fingers, and you'd think these would be better. These tasted oddly of ash. I mean, ash? Why would they taste like that? Anyway, the breading fell off the chicken and these were really wet and got all over my fingers. Not good.

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers Crinkle-Cut Fries

Crinkle-Cut Fries are a way to take a potato and make it stretch so you think you have more. Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers Fries are just kind of there and not as good as most fries but not as bad as Karl's Jr. fries. I mean, these are just okay. Then again, I have always thought of Crinkle-Cut as a sign of a second class fast food joint.

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers Texas Toast

 

Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers serves this Texas Toast. It tastes sweet and it's soft on the inside but crunchy on the outside. I like the stuff but it was supposed to taste like garlic. Funny tasting, but good.  

La Colombe Coffee Triple Draft Latte

La Colombe Coffee Triple Draft Latte has the smooth flavor of milk and the ... well, it kind of tastes like milk really. I know there is some coffee in there, but I can't taste much of it. 

This is supposed to be like three shots of espresso.  I didn't feel the kick, but I'm so caffeinated at this point I never do.