Kit Kat Lemon Crisp

Kit Kat Lemon Crisp is your good old kit kat with a new lemon fresh taste. So far, I've never gone wrong with a Kit Kat and these are just the right amount of tarts. If you like lemon this is a must try. If you're only okay with lemon these are still good.

Back to Nature Triple Ginger Cookies

 Living up to their name Back to Nature Triple Ginger Cookies have a burst of ginger in every bite that is sure to clear your nose of any booger that is ginger sensitive. I like these because I honestly can't deal with all that flavor so I can't eat them all day. They have all the ginger promised, and that's a good thing.

Mariner Biscuit Company Sesame Lavasch

 I'm not sure what Lavasch is, but the Mariner Biscuit Company Sesame variety is good right out of the box. I have to say I like these a little too much and I can't figure why. They are just normal tasting crispy sesame crackers, but once I open the box I eat the whole thing. 

It could be because these are good, or because I am that fat.  Reviewing food can be depressing.

Blueberry Lemon*Ade

 Blueberry Lemon Ade looks like the kind of purple stuff you should have at your Halloween party next month. If we can have them. It's a good thing this goes great with vodka, because now I'm depressed. I haven't even been to a Halloween party, and I still miss them. 

Now, I'm even more depressed. I don't have a lot of friends...and the friends I do have are too old and poor to party even without lock downs and economic problems. 

Oh, well, party on my own tonight with 50's B movies, vodka, and this stuff. Drink the pain away! Um, but drink responsibly.

Talking Rain Original Sparkling Water

What is it about Talking Rain that is so good? I mean, it's just water right? Anyway Original Sparkling Water by Talking Rain is crisp and fresh. I never thought I would really like water but this stuff just hits the spot. I hope they have more of this when I got to the store.

Armour Potted Meat Barbecue Flavored

 Armour Potted Meat Barbecue Flavored tastes nothing like barbecue but I saw it, thought of the film 'Sling Blade', and had to buy some. I have to say, stuff tastes like bacon and my cats just wouldn't leave me alone until I let them try it. I don't think they were as impressed. 

I've never had potted meat before, and I have to say I was missing out. I want to sit on a boat, and drink wine as I eat this with crackers. 

Tillamook Extra Creamy Salted Butter

 Tillamook Extra Creamy Salted Butter is a thing I'm reviewing because I need another review and it was at the store. I normally only get their cheese and ice cream. 

This is butter like all other butter I have tried but that extra creamy boast has got to be a lie. You heat it up, okay, creamy. Out of the cooler, not so creamy. 

I mean, butter is butter so why the distinction. Is this butter trying to be peanut butter? Butter, you don't have to compete with peanut butter. . .if you did I think you would lose, but you don't have to compete.

Bugles Hot Buffalo Flavor

 

 

Bugles Hot Buffalo Flavor at first bite remind you of good bugles. The flavor then starts to sink in, and you need a drink. Not that these are really hot but they just make you want to drink that flavor away. They taste nothing like buffalo, or that sauce people put on wings and call it buffalo, and I don't think they are made in Buffalo. Thus, the only true part about the flavor is the hot, and it's not that hot. 

 

I don't care for these. I think normal Bugles are much better. Fail, total fail. 

Golden Krust Jamaican Style Jerk Chicken Patty

 'Golden Krust Jamaican Style Jerk Chicken Patty' I think you should let that name sink in. 'Jerk Chicken' sounds like a man who does not speak English well asking a lady of the night for something. 

These things are more commonly called pasties stuffed with Vindaloo. I have to say these aren't bad, but they could be more, um, chicken filled. The chicken you get in these is lacking in thereness. 

All and all, not everyone would want to eat these things and really feel like low quality food. If you're feeling adventurous and you can find one of these, go for it, but don't stalk up because they are something of a disappointment. 

Canada Dry Original Sparkling Seltzer Water

 Canada Dry Original Sparkling Seltzer Water setting the standard for stuff to put your whisky in since 1904. You don't get more classy than Canada Dry so far as I know. Then I don't know much about those kind of parties anyway. 

Canada Dry Seltzer is a smooth Sparkling Water that will get the job done. I like it, most folks do as well. 

Then, most seltzer is seltzer I guess. 

Philadelphia Cream Cheese Smoked Salmon

 Philadelphia Cream Cheese Smoked Salmon sounds like a good idea. I mean, I would put smoked salmon over cream cheese on my bagel. The problem is that the smoked flavor is lost and the texture of salmon gone. As well, lost is the tartness of the cream cheese that I know so well. This tastes like someone heard about it and tried to make it without having the right things to make it with. 

This is a fail so hard I want to go back to the store and get the real thing so I can remember what it tastes like. 

Blue Diamond Almonds Nut-Thins Snack Crackers Sea Salt

 Blue Diamond Almonds Nut-Thins Snack Crackers Sea Salt honestly grow on me. I mean, I didn't like them at first but then I had them with something and they were so much better. After that I could eat them alone and they're great. I have to admit they just have an odd texture to me so after you get used to them they're fine. 

I may buy these again.

Stryve Foods Beef Biltong Sticks Hatch Green Chile

 Aside from being dry Stryve Foods Beef Biltong Sticks Hatch Green Chile are a fine chewy beef jerky with a flavor that is enough to make you like it but not so much as you need to down water that you should have on your hike. They are an unoffensive food that I can take or leave. 

Again, I'm more of a teriyaki turkey jerky fan so this stuff would be a bit off my path. Still good, if you're into this kind of jerky it's a dry but solid buy.

Betty Crocker Parmesan and Asiago Potatoes

 Betty Crocker Parmesan and Asiago Potatoes look like potato chips before you cook them, but don't taste as good. I tried one and it was hard to chew. After cooking these are a little better, but not all that much. Creamy but only passable I wouldn't get these again. 

They should add a little more flavor to these, and make the box a little easier to read. I mean, fail, sad quiet fail. 

Finest Spaghetti Rings Pasta in Tomato Sauce with Meat

 Finest Spaghetti Rings Pasta in Tomato Sauce with Meat is discount Spaghetti O's. I think I like the old O's better but these, well, work. I don't know if I would know which was which if I didn't see them come out of the can. These are a thing and an okay thing. I don't think they live up to the name 'Finest' but what lives up to it's name now days?

Dave's Killer Bread Plain Awesome Organic Bagels

 Dave's Killer Bread Plain Awesome Organic Bagels are okay. They are not awesome, but there is nothing wrong with them. I have to say that as plain bagels go these are definitely plain.

Once you get past the fun name there is little to these bagels, but I don't know what I was expecting. I mean, they are only as good as what you have them with, but if the brand makes you feel cool then, by all means, go on with your bad self.

Fast Bites Sausage & Cheese Biscuit

 Fast Bites Sausage & Cheese Biscuit follow the proud tradition of some lazy dude taking a dinner roll and eating it for breakfast. At first, these rolls where stale and had to be covered in gravy. As we progressed as a people we learned to make rolls that lasted longer and we could simply cut them in half and slap sausage inside. 

If you're hoping to have one of these and run until lunch you will be disappointed. However, they are the right mix of carbs, fat, and protein to start your day. If you had these with an apple and a banana you would be good. A bowl of mixed vegetables would also serve you to make these a meal. Just don't go eating them on their own unless you want to look like me. . .I look like Santa without the beard.

Stampede Bone-In Pork Loin Chop

I picked up these Stampede Bone-In Pork Loin Chops at a dollar store, and for a buck it's not bad. I will point out that it's more salt than pork and so requires know how when cooking. 

I tossed this in the oven for two hours with some rice and it came out okay. Cooking it on the stove left it too salty. Over all, I can't say that I recommend these, and I can't say to keep clear. 

This is a pork chop for a poor man, and I'm a poor man so I may get more.
 

Kool-Aid Sparklers Tropical Punch

 Kool-Aid Sparklers Tropical Punch is not the best of the Sparklers line. In fact, I'd have to say that it needs more, I don't know, zing. It tastes fine but that's just the problem that fine isn't what it's competing with. 

I always thought that Kool-Aid was invented for poor people to make their tap water drinkable before it killed them from rust poisoning, but then this canned stuff should be free of that. 

Stuff is okay and good on a hot day, but there are better flavors you can get.  

Lunch Box Poppin' Pepperoni & Jack

 Lunch Box Poppin' Pepperoni & Jack are by far the best of these things I've had. This is mostly because of mouth feel as the other flavors of this line use poor quality meat. The pepperoni overwhelms the flavor of the jack so the cheese is hardly noticeable. 

I rate these a buy, and I really like them, but I realize I should just make my own sandwich. 

HT Traders Original Specialty Water Crackers

 HT Traders Original Specialty Water Crackers totally kick tail. I mean, I love these crispy critters and I had to stop myself from eating them all before I took this shot. I don't know what it is about these but they taste fresh from the oven. I like these so much more than I should. Maybe it's because I'm fat and love food too much.

Pop-Tarts, Crisps, Frosted Blueberrific

 Pop-Tarts, Crisps, Frosted Blueberrific is some kind of breakfast bar version of a Pop-Tart. They come out of the toaster like a limp fish and flop around when you try to move them. They will also burn your hand so the toaster is kind of out.

Eating these without toasting them takes a lot of the good out of them, but they are okay.  I toasted these and let them cool enough for me to put in my coffee. 

These are better for dipping then normal Pop-Tarts so they are better in that regard. Not bad, would buy again.

Mrs. Paul's Crunchy Fish Sticks

 Mrs. Paul's Crunchy Fish Sticks taste like fish sticks. I mean, fish sticks are for the most part fish sticks, and you eat them more for what you put on them than what they taste like right? I have always loved fish sticks but I know these things are bad for me. I over cook them to give them that crunch.

As addictive as any good fish stick should be. 

Cheez It Cheese Pizza

 Cheez It Cheese Pizza is a cheez It with some green herbs and a bit of tomato flavor. I have to say these are good. Not a massive amount better than Cheez Its on there own and not as good as cheese pizza. If your a cheese cracker fan these are a great thing to try.

Over all, take them or leave them but, like pizza, even when not great they are still good.

TalkingRain Sparkling Water Lemon Lime

 TalkingRain Sparkling Water Lemon Lime is one of those 'well, sure it's going to be good' because lemon lime and sparkling water just go hand in hand. This brand of sparkling water tends to be smooth to start out with and so far this is the best flavor I've had. 

Then again, it's still just water and it's not that impressive. The only reason I review this stuff is because it was new at the store and I need to drink more water because soda is making me fat. 

I get the stuff in cans so that I can donate the empty cans to the homeless. I'm fat, depressed, but a good person.

Uala Pure Purple Power Strawberry

 Uala Pure Purple Power Strawberry is a yam substitute for yogurt. This stuff is tart enough to put on a bagel, but slightly too rich to eat on its own. You can have this with trail mix or anything you want to add berry putty to. It's kind of like apple sauce really and if you like apple sauce and are a crazy hippy  then this is your jam. I mean, literally, use it as jam.

Aha Black Cherry + Coffee

 Aha Black Cherry + Coffee is a sparkling water that has no calories but some caffeine. I love things with caffeine so I think these are a great idea if an odd combination. The only thing is that if I wanted coffee I would drink coffee and leave this stuff alone.

This stuff is just fine. I don't know if it will jive with everyone, but I think it's okay. The flavor is a little odd but it works. Aha, not bad.

El Monterey Signature Beef Enchiladas

 El Monterey Signature Beef Enchiladas are a far cry from what they look like on the box. I mean, look at that shredded beef. That wasn't what I got. The beef I got was more of a mush. I could tell it was beef at least, but aside from not being mystery meat it wasn't what the cover promised. 

The sauce was overabundant and there was more cheese then the box shows. I don't know if drowning this in red stuff makes up for that beef disappointment.These things are okay as foe Mexican food goes. Where I live you can get the real deal and I don't go for Enchiladas all that much. I rank these a buy if you get them at a good price.

 

Kodiak Cakes Brownie Unleashed Mint Chocolate

 In our sad lonely world Kodiak Cakes Brownie Unleashed Mint Chocolate is a brownie for one. It's not the greatest brownie for one. This is a brownie for those who want a brownie, but only want to eat one and normally can't stop. 

It's still a brownie, it's still good, it's just not super. Not very minty, but not a bad snack. 

Stryve Foods, Beef Biltong Stick, Mesquite BBQ

 Stryve Foods, Beef Biltong Stick, Mesquite BBQ is the kind of beef jerky with bits you can't chew. I'm not a jerky fan but for the savory jerky enthusiast this has to be your ticket.

These reviews are hard to write with a big orange cat pawing at you.

In any case, I wouldn't get these again because I'm just more a fan of sweet jerky, but I can see how these are well made.

Red Velvet Jell-O

Red Velvet Jell-O is part of the Red Velvet craze that is going around. Red Velvet is just chocolate but here we are. This stuff tastes fine, and does not mix well with milk giving it an uneven texture. 

All and all, if you're a red velvet fan you'll be disappointed. Still, tastes good.