Cactus Cooler

Cactus Cooler is a thing from my youth, and a soda that has a fun name. Everything about this stuff tells me that it's made of the heart of summer and the time of fun. 

Why am I drinking this now again. Well, I miss summer.

Fresh Donuts Cinnamon Crumb

Over at Fresh Donuts in La Puente, California the Cinnamon Crumb is a great doughnut to buy. I like to heat these up and have them with ice cream because their spice makes them stand out against the colder sweet. These are some really great doughnuts and you should try one if you like Cinnamon.

RightRice Thai Curry

It's hard to believe that there is ever a shortage of the white stuff Americans eat at fake Asian restaurants. It is a little harder to wrap my brain around the idea that the best of that white stuff is grown in good old California. 

So here we have RightRice Thai Curry a protein and fiber heavy rice that is made to be better for you than the white stuff. 

Truth is that it cooks faster and comes pre-seasoned so if your making dinner and don't want to do a lot of thinking this is a good idea. It's not as durable as real rice and will get soft and lose it's shape with long cooking times. 

If you're a body builder sick of steamed brown rice or a homemaker looking to add a quick meal option this stuff make sense. I like the versatility of real rice over this stuff, but it does what it should and tastes okay doing it. 

The curry flavor could be stronger.  Then again, you don't want your rice to overpower your meal. I say, try this and see if you like it. It may just make your life easier.

Lantana Spicy Yellow Lentil Hummus

Lantana Spicy Yellow Lentil Hummus would be unremarkable were it not for the apricots that ting it's flavor. This is not to say that they are good, but rather that they set a tone. Neither my brother or I liked this because of them. 

I mean, this was edible but not great. 

Hellmann's Real Ketchup

Hellmann's Real Ketchup is made with honey. It still tastes like ketchup to me. I mean, it's good ketchup, but still ketchup. I don't know, I love the bees, but do they want us to take their honey?

Fresh Donuts Glazed Twist

At Fresh Donuts in La Puente, California this is the classic Glazed Twist. You know if you like these, and you therefor know if you would buy them. I love these things. They kill me so good.

Explore Cuisine Organic Red Lentil Penne Pasta

Explore Cuisine Organic Red Lentil Penne Pasta is the pasta for you if getting beefy is your thing. It has more fiber and protein than normal pasta and the taste is unoffensive. 

Yes, I have had offensive tasting pasta. It's hard and woody. That sounded so wrong. Anyway, I would get more Explore Cuisine Organic Red Lentil Penne Pasta.

Don Miguel Chicken, Beans & Rice Chimichanga

Don Miguel Chicken, Beans & Rice Chimichanga was on sale for just under a dollar. I have to say I like these but the half hour it takes to make one is just a bit prohibitive. I like to put these right in the oven to avoid messing up a pan and it works. 

After that there is only a hint of spice in these which makes them still more American then Mexican, but I believe the Chimichanga was invented in California anyway. Not bad, would buy again.

Prego Four Cheese Alfredo

I tried blanching cabbage in my Prego Four Cheese Alfredo and it worked okay. Cabbage, for those of you who don't know, was considered a super food in ancient Rome. 

A little sliced cabbage in your Alfredo can keep the plague off you. This stuff is okay for covering up the fact that you are eating cabbage. It's not the greatest thing in the world, but it will help get that cabbage down. 

Luma Premium Soda Lemon Lime

Luma Premium Soda Lemon Lime is a soda that works well with vodka. I know that any lemon lime woulds but this one has fewer calories and still tastes okay. If you're trying to cut down but diet soda gives you the runs like it does to me this is a great alternative. 

I have only seen this on sale once and it's a shame.

Zatarain's Salsa Verde

I don't know what Salsa Verde is but Zatarain's Salsa Verde was a mild beens and rice combination. I guess if you're a working stiff and need somthing other than just a starch these spice of the meal some. 

Then, I had to put some in plastic and never did get round to eating them. This is in no way a bad product, it just isn't great. 

Beach Cliff Sardines in Water

I don't know if I understand this product. These little fish taste okay, but even my cats look at me funny when I serve them. I think they are meant to supply an inexpensive form of protein to poor people who can't have tuna. They make your breath bad but you can live off them. When you think about it the level of indifference I feel towards these makes them an ideal emergency supply. I can eat these to keep my body going but would never eat them just because I was bored. 

Pop Chips Ridges Buffalo Ranch

Pop Chips Ridges Buffalo Ranch can be eaten without dip. You get very few in the bag and they're not as hot as I would have expected. 

You eat these and feel like you haven't had chips which can get you into trouble because you won't feel full. I really don't know what I thing and theses thing but I couldn't get them again.

Cracker barrel Single Bowl Macaroni & Cheese Dinner Sharp White Cheddar

Cracker barrel Single Bowl Macaroni & Cheese Dinner Sharp White Cheddar is more of that swanky food that you just look at and think 'well, that's posh'. I find this to be a bit of an oddity. I mean, it's not bad but it's not as good as the normal deal.

I wouldn't get this again unless it was a good deal. 

Banquet Popcorn Chicken

Few things in my life have been as much of an outright disappointment as Banquet Popcorn Chicken. I cooked this stuff three times as long as the pack says and it still will not crisp up. Stale tasting and soft these little buggers are something to put your dip on and little more. 

I mean, I'm a big fat guy, to us popcorn chicken is like little balls of happiness. These are just sad.

Lotte Toppo

Lotte Toppo are chocolate filled pretzel sticks. Oh, did you need to know more. These things are great for dipping in your coffee and have a satisfying crunch. I only wish they were a little bigger.

Albert's Mexican Food #2 Two Beef Tacos

Albert's Mexican Food #2 Two Beef Tacos is a small amount of happiness. Then, I really like tacos. I will have to say that these tacos are kind of bland for Mexican food, but very flavorful as American food. 

One of the things you need to understand is that this is not very Mexican. It's food, it tastes okay, and I'll keep eating it. 

Fiber One Birthday Cake Bars

Unimpressive without a cup of coffee Fiber One Birthday Cake Bars are kind of mild. I mean, they do enough to fill your gut, and you will eat them if you're hungry. You're just not going to go craving these things.

All in all, there are better offerings from Fiber One, and I'm a big fat guy saying I'm not happy with that cake. Think about that. 

Old ElPaso Soft Tortilla Bowl Buttery Homestyle

Old ElPaso Soft Tortilla Bowl Buttery Homestyle are one way to make an American taco. America has come up with many ways to taco over the years, but Mexico just keeps looking at us funny. 

In any case, these are just fine, a little small, and take up a lot of room in the oven when you make them. They still get everywhere when you eat them but that's just an American taco. 

In any case, I would get these again. 

Mariner Biscuit Company Everything Lavasch

Mariner Biscuit Company Everything Lavasch taste kind of like garlic crackers. I have to say I really like these things but I can't figure what one does with them as they don't tend to go well with most of the dips I have. 

I can eat them right our of the box. Maybe with something mild like cream cheese.  Had I not eaten the whole box I would go try that now. 

I am so fat. 

White Claw Hard Seltzer Black Cherry

If you're looking to get drunk White Claw Hard Seltzer Black Cherry is not for you with only five percent booze. Still, it's refreshing enough and you can add some real alcohol if need be. If this were none alcoholic I would probably think of it as a better flavor or seltzer. Not bad stuff, just not great.

Fresh Donuts Glazed Buttermilk Bar

Fresh Donuts Glazed Buttermilk Bar is a buttermilk bar with glaze on it. Mmmmh, sugar, carbs, this is why I'm fat. I feel so bad eating these...they are better if you put them in the microwave then add ice cream.

Fresh to You Ham & Swiss on Croissant

'Fresh to You' Ham & Swiss on Croissant was the kind of thing you don't really want to eat cold so I opened it up, pulled out the greens, and nuked the thing. This did not make it impressive in any way.

It was coming apart and left crumbs all over the place. This sandwich is a disappointment. Then again it could have just been old.

 

Great Value Wild Caught Sardines in Oil

Two cans of 'Great Value Wild Caught Sardines in Oil' showed up in a bag of cat food someone gave me and I decided to save them to celebrate a foster cat going home. I had one going home so my brother and I, and all the cats, tried these things. 

They didn't taste that bad. I mean, I wouldn't go looking for them but they weren't bad at all. The cats were mostly impressed but old Jack said he would rather eat the barf of another cat ... he eats the barf of another cat all the time. 

Great Value Brand sardines aren't that fishy. 

Foodstirs Modern Baking Organic Minute Mug Cake Mix Cinnamon Swirl Coffee Cake

Foodstirs Modern Baking Organic Minute Mug Cake Mix Cinnamon Swirl Coffee Cake should just be called Cinnamon Coffee Cake because I don't see a swirl. After that, this is better than a good number of instant cakes I've had, and being a four hundred pound monster I've had a lot of them.

These are a cut above the rest, not a high cut, but a cut above none the less. 

Keebler Scooby-Doo! Baked Graham Crackers Sticks

Keebler Scooby-Doo! Baked Graham Crackers Sticks do not remind me of dog. I guess that's a good thing but they look like little dog bones so I have to ask why they would do that?

If it has ever been your inclination to eat dog biscuits then this is your bag. If not, well, disappointed. 

Fresh Donuts Glazed Cruller

At Fresh Donuts in La Puenta California the Glazed Cruller looks like this. I've never been a fan of crullers so I'm still not a fan now. I think these things are only good if they're hot. There are much better doughnuts at this place.

Star Wars Space Punch

May the 4th be with you with this Star Wars Space Punch. It's just the thing to keep your vitamins up on those long space missions. Like most Cliché space foods this tastes like crap and you can probably still find it at the local discount store. Now I need to go feed this crap to my plants. Blaa!

Ore-Ida Garlic Homestyle Mashed Potatoes

Ore-Ida Garlic Homestyle Mashed Potatoes are an interesting addition to my vegetables. For the most part that's what I do with them. I put them on steamed vegetables to make them more edible. You know what? It works. I can put those vegetables in the refrigerator, and eat them the next day without issue. With this I can steam more healthy food.

D'Oro Spaghetti Sauce

Flavored with Meat says the bottle of this D'Oro Spaghetti Sauce, but all I taste is tomato and salt. It could be that I made this stuff with sausage which is salty as well.

All told, this is a smooth sauce that can work well with browned hamburger. If you like your sauce smooth or like to be the one who puts the chunks in then this is for you. 

Nos Rowdy Punch Energy Drink

Nos Rowdy Punch Energy Drink tastes like punch, sort of, and does nothing for me. I mean, it's better than nothing and I didn't have a crash, but it didn't get me really going. Nos works okay and I got it because it was inexpensive. I'd recommend you only get it for that reason.