Banza Rigatoni

Banza Rigatoni is what you eat when you want to have pasta but don't want to look like me. I love this brand of pasta because I love chickpeas and would eat them all the time if I had the time to make them. 

My life is so full, and I am so fat. 

Arya Curcumin+

Arya Curcumin+ is seltzer water that tastes like very little and serves to get the flavor of bad spirits thinned out. As this is low in calorie and high in color I would have to say I like the fact that this exists. 

I'm not going to put it on my buy list, but this stuff is worth having around when you want to look impressive but not get fat.  

Coca Cola (American)

It’s said that before Coca Cola Santa Claus was a gaunt and brooding figure. Then Coke came along, and he turned into a jolly fat man.

Given how Coke made me into a fat man I think it’s safe to say this is a reasonable representation of the product.  Further, American Coke is harder on your liver because of the use of high fructose corn syrup.

This addictive death juice will never tell your body that you’re done, because fructose almost never comes about in nature without sucrose. We humans have evolved to key off sucrose to tell us to stop eating.

I’d say ‘drink water’ but then drinking water is often dangerous. Drink clean water whenever you can, and stay clear of Coke and other soft drinks most of the time.

Coke is the standard for which all soda pop can be judged, and my judgment is to enjoy in moderation else you look like me. I, by the way, look like Santa.

Now, I need to get me some Ho, ho, ho’s.