Brach's Speckled Jelly Bird Eggs

Nothing says rebirth of a god like jelly beans and Brach's Speckled Jelly Bird Eggs taste just like the beans I got as a kid. This is to say they are cheap and should never be eaten.

Let's be clear, I'm Jewish and never did care for pagan rituals like Easter and Christmas. In addition, I am a ridiculous blob of a man at four hundred and fifteen pounds. That said, I shouldn't eat jelly beans or jelly bird eggs or jelly anything for that matter. 

These are the candies that get left for last and get eaten during Saturday cartoons. If your kids are thin then these are find, but if they're fat like I am then it's best to leave these at the store.