Chips Ahoy! Chewy Confetti Cake Chocolate Chip Cookies with Sprinkles

 Chips Ahoy! Chewy Confetti Cake Chocolate Chip Cookies with Sprinkles have a very long name. I mean, how much do you need to say about cookies in a name. If the cookies were as good as the name is long then these would be the best cookies I'd have ever had. 

These cookies are, well, okay. I don't think much of them. I don't have a thing for chewy cookies to start with but these had too much going on. I'd skip these myself, but if you like it chewy they may just be underwhelming.

Hu Grain-Free Chocolate Chip Cookies

I don't know what angry spirit I offended to run across these Hu Grain-Free Chocolate Chip Cookies, but I fear its wrath. These taste like fish.

What is the point of making cookies that are just less bad for you? Eat an apple. It will taste better and be better for you.
 

First Street Chocolate Chip Muffins

 First Street Chocolate Chip Muffins are the kind of thing that fills the need but goes no further. I'll grant the ones I got were listed as 'reduced price for quick sale', but these were flavorless. 

This is not to say they were bad but rather that they just were. They fulfill the definition of Chocolate Chip Muffins, but go no further. I would say these needed more vanilla, yes you do put that in muffins, or perhaps some more salt. 

The point is that if you are having these with coffee it better be good coffee.

Nestle Toll House Valentine Chocolate Chip Cookie dough

 Nestle Toll House Valentine Chocolate Chip Cookie dough was all over the place last year. I think this is for moms and sad lonely people who don't know much about romance. The red and pink candy hearts make them a step down from normal chocolate chip cookies.

Valentines day is a day we buy things we shouldn't and get fat. Most holidays are, and I never thought much of it, but if you want to show a loved one you care about them I don't think this is the way. I gave my mother breakfast in bed, for example, but for most of us men we should just do the dishes.

Old Fashioned Chocolate Chip Flavored Cookies

 Old Fashioned Chocolate Chip Flavored Cookies are stale nightmares of cookies that you would only eat when you are so hungry you could eat your own foot. I mean, not my foot, but your foot isn't as chewy as mine. 

In any case, the unopened cookies go to the homeless who just may be that hungry. As they are chocolate flavored no chocolate was harmed in the making of these abominations.

Famous Amos Bite Size Cookies Chocolate Chip

Famous Amos Bite Size Cookies Chocolate Chip are the cookies that you find in every vending machine across America. I wonder if Trump eats them. Anyway, I mean, cookies...who doesn't love them? These things, who doesn't think of cookies when you see them?

Little Debbie Cosmic Brownies with Chocolate Chip Candy

Little Debbie Cosmic Brownies with Chocolate Chip Candy are a disappointment in fudge. By that I mean they look and taste like bad fudge as a posed to brownies. 

Cosmic Brownies should have something that makes them cosmic if you ask me but these candy bits don't make you see the purple dragon and that white monster on the box doesn't come out and play.  

Fail. 

McDonald's Chocolate Chip Frappe

The Chocolate Chip Frappe at McDonald's is a fail. The topping is sweeter than the drink making it taste bland. You can feel the ice bits in your mouth, and the chocolate just sinks to the bottom. Waist of good chocolate chips if you ask me. 

PowerBar Clean Whey Protein Bar Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough

PowerBar Clean Whey Protein Bar Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough is a nightmarish taffy like substance that is hard to chew and is an insult to cookie dough flavors everywhere. 

Now, I have to admit that I use these as rations for when I'm at work and can't go get food so they are just perfect for that. I mean, you can only eat these if you're really hungry. That mean's I won't go eating them because they taste good and they don't look like heat can mess with them too much. 

I have a work bag that gets left in the car so food that squashes or melts in no good for me. Still, I only got them because they were on sale. 

Cafe Valley Bakery Gourmet Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins

Gourmet Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins by Cafe Valley Bakery are basically chocolate chip muffins. They have no real pumpkin like qualities. Moreover, the first ingredient is sugar and there are more chocolate chips than there is pumpkin. 

These taste great, are bad for you, and have very little of the important ingredient. I feel so used.