Saturday, April 30, 2022

Wiley Wallaby Soft & Chewy Classic Black Gourmet Licorice


 Wiley Wallaby Soft & Chewy Classic Black Gourmet Licorice appears to be a licorice above.  I miss my old Red Vine with its hollow centers and to be honest this isn't as chewy. I mean, this is fine licorice, but it isn't the kind I want to chew on on movie night.  

Wiley Wallaby is better quality, I think I just like the old brand because it reminds me of good times.  

Friday, April 29, 2022

La Brea Bakery Sunflower Turmeric Rolls

La Brea Bakery Sunflower Turmeric Rolls have just the right amount of zest to make them a good addition to your dinner party. Even with unsalted butter they will still hold up.

Turmeric can really be a curse of lift to any meal. Here it works and I have to say that it works well. Good job La Brea Bakery. 
 

Thursday, April 28, 2022

Classico Creamy Alfredo Pasta Sauce


 Before you ask there is an Alfredo to this Classico Creamy Alfredo Pasta Sauce. So if you don't like creamy Alfredo there is a less creamy option. I have to admit that I was surprised to learn that I hadn't reviewed this sauce as I have been eating it for years. 

I mean, to me this is what Alfredo sauce has always been. It's mild and creamy with nothing offensive about it to the milk drinking public.

Wednesday, April 27, 2022

M&M'S English Toffee Peanut


 M&M'S English Toffee Peanut is some kind of contest winner. I have to say that this is a flavor that I think is worth trying given that I like toffee. 

So many flavors aren't a big improvement on the original and these, well, they are worthwhile if not better. I say you should try these because they are rather good. Then again, I'm a big fat man so I like chocolate way too much.

Tuesday, April 26, 2022

Keebler Fudge Stripes Make-A-Wish Cookies

Keebler Fudge Stripes Make-A-Wish Cookies where at the discount market and buying them means you support the Make a Wish foundation. 

I have to say that as soon as I opened the pack the smell told me these will be good. They smell like cake. They are not highly improved by coffee, but they taste great.  

They whole blue thing may be off putting but I can say these cookies are so good I'm taking the second pack to work to get them out of the house before my fat self eats them all. 
 

Monday, April 25, 2022

Albertsons Ready Meals Ham & Swiss Pretzel Duo Sandwich


 Albertsons Ready Meals Ham & Swiss Pretzel Duo Sandwich have a strangely banana flavor. The salt corns tend to fall off the bread and don't add much to the flavor. 

If it were not so strangely fruity it would be a really good sandwich. Then again, what is a really good sandwich?

Sunday, April 24, 2022

Melba's Fixins Strawberries and Cream Soda


 At four dollars a bottle Melba's Fixins Strawberries and Cream Soda isn't the kind of thing you buy of any old day of drinking. It's a real sugar novelty soda that tastes fine but isn't better than most other sodas. I would have to say it would be better with a shot of vodka, but when is that not true, but that price is so prohibitive. 

The truth is, once you pass the novelty of this soda you have a better time with a case of no name strawberry soda from the local store. Which will often be less than one bottle of this.

Saturday, April 23, 2022

World Wildlife Fund Bucket of Frogs


 Have you ever wanted a bucket of frogs? I don't mean for eating. I live in California. We don't really eat frog here. 

The World Wildlife Fund Bucket of Frogs is what you get when you need toys but want to help the environment. They are good sized frogs if a little oddly shaped. I would say they are a little smaller than a soda can. 

What I really want to know is what my money is going to, but with WWF I think they do so much it's hard to know. All in all, as a product these are fun and all the more fun when they save real frogs. 

Friday, April 22, 2022

Heinz Honeyracha Sauce

I thought this Heinz Honeyracha Sauce was ketchup. I have to say where as I like this stuff I can't say what one would put it on. This is hot, but not very hot, and sweet. 

If you're a big chicken finger fan than this stuff is good to have around, and I have to say it works. It's still not ketchup so you may be upset if you reach for this expecting ketchup, but then when has food last surprised you?
 

Thursday, April 21, 2022

Slurpee Cherry


 Is there anything like the classic Cherry Slurpee? Yeah, the Cherry Snow Icee. Those were good. Or did I just love them because I had them as a child, and they remind me of my late mother.  

I remember them being better than a Cherry Slurpee which is best had on a hot day. I still love Slurpees. I like it cold I guess. 


 

Wednesday, April 20, 2022

Hood Boston Vanilla Bean Ice Cream

I have no idea what Boston Vanilla is but I guess they used it in this Hood Boston Vanilla Bean Ice Cream. It does have real bits of vanilla bean in there which is a good thing. It isn't enough vanilla which is a bad thing. 

To be honest, this just isn't all that great on it's own. this is the kind of ice cream that needs to be part of a bigger thing. Add some sprinkles or jelly beans to make this good and you're golden but on it's own it's kind of bland.
 

Tuesday, April 19, 2022

Colliders Chopped Hersheys Chocolate

Colliders Chopped Hershey's Chocolate is chocolate pudding like stuff along with more chocolate bits to go along with it. I have to admit pudding always goes down fast and you never feel like you got enough. 

Or is that just me for being fat. Fat people like me should never eat pudding anyway. I think we fat people all love pudding. 

Anyway, these are okay, not great but okay. I would try the other flavors of this, but because fat people shouldn't eat these I would not buy them again. I guess I would if I was skinny. 

Being fat stinks. 
 

Monday, April 18, 2022

Colonna Traditional Sauce


 Colonna Traditional Sauce is smooth and unoffensive, really what I like my pasta sauce to be like, it has no large chunks. One may argue that it has little flavor for Italian anything. This is true, this stuff is flavorless American food, but if you cook like me and like to add sausage to your noodles this is the right thing to do it with. 

I mark this a buy, but I don't want to look at the label and see what's in it. Scratch that, I just looked at the label and it had too much salt..but what doesn't?

Sunday, April 17, 2022

M&M's Peanut Butter Eggs


 M&M's Peanut Butter Eggs are one of those Easter things we shove in our face to make the sadness go away. Frankly, I love these little drops of slow death that are killing my massive body. They are wonderful in my mouth and horror on my scale. 

Oh, they kill me so good.

Saturday, April 16, 2022

Reese's Mallow-Top Peanut Butter Cups


 Reese's Mallow-Top Peanut Butter Cups are not as good as the original. That said, I cannot stop eating them so they are good enough. If you have the chance to get these at a low price I say go for it. If not, go for the real deal...unless you're as fat as I am then you shouldn't eat these at all.

Friday, April 15, 2022

Sour Patch Kids White Chocolate Flavored Bunny


 I feel like there was some kind of leftover at the candy factory that was thrown into this Sour Patch Kids White Chocolate Flavored Bunny. You can't really taste the Sour Patch Kids but the flavoring they used to make fake white chocolate is very convincing.  

I would stay away from this not because it tastes bad, but rather because it's not good for you, and doesn't taste good enough to justify the Calories.  

Lab grown nightmare candy. 

Thursday, April 14, 2022

Peeps Marshmallow Chicks Double Hot Chocolate


 Peeps Marshmallow Chicks Double Hot Chocolate are some of the best Peeps I've ever had. I'm not a big fan of Peeps, but they keep coming up with new versions that end up on sale and so on this blog. 

I have to say that the mix of marshmallow and chocolate works well here, and as much as I would avoid buying these again because I'm a fat blob, I have to admit they are very good. 

Two thumbs up. 

Wednesday, April 13, 2022

Baileys Apple Pie


 Baileys Apple Pie is a flavor of Irish Cream that has been floating about for a few months now and I had a time getting hold of it. Now I think it's common but I had a time. 

To get the flavor of this bottle you need to give it a good shake because otherwise it's going to taste like nothing. 

I would have expected this to have more flavor to it, but I'm unimpressed. In the world of flavor this is a 'why bother'. Baileys, step up your game!

Gold Star Hamburger Chili Omelet


Over at Gold Star Hamburger in Glendale California, the Chili Omelet is a thing. It's the mud chili that you get at a number of small fast food places so if you were looking for some heat this isn't for you. 

I have to say I don't get this. It works okay and I think dipping my toast in that stuff is a great idea if you don't want to use jelly.  Then, I have to admit that looking at this makes me want to eat another one. 

All in all, this is something that will get you going in the morning. It's worth trying.

Tuesday, April 12, 2022

Strong Roots Beetroot & Bean Burger


 Strong Roots Beetroot & Bean Burger are just plane nasty. I mean, they are more like chicken burgers than beef, but the texture in your mouth is not even and there are chewy parts you just don't want to eat. 

I don't know why I keep trying vegan food. I guess I feel like I should eat less meat. However, these are nothing like meat and are some of the worst meat substitutes I have ever had.  

If you like beets you may like these, but if you like beets then eat beets. 

Monday, April 11, 2022

Twisted Green Berry Punch

Twisted Green Berry Punch sounds so much cooler than it is. This stuff doesn't even have any true berry flavors in it. Mostly it tastes like kiwi, it has way too much sugar, and is almost a full meal. 

I'd keep clear of this unless you are one of those way too skinny people. 
 

Sunday, April 10, 2022

Stack Man 9" Plates

Stack Man 9" Plates are hopefully a more eco friendly paper plate. They boast of being 100% compostable but then how compostable are  normal paper plates?

They can't take that much water, but what paper plate can? I got these to feed my cats, and they look to be working fine for that. I have been tossing them in the compost bin but they haven't been there long enough to degrade. 

So, they work, I'll keep buying them. 
 

Saturday, April 9, 2022

DiGorno Artisan Thin Crust 4 Meat & Roasted Red Pepper Sauce


 DiGorno Artisan Thin Crust 4 Meat & Roasted Red Pepper Sauce is a pizza worth eating. I mean that, one person can eat this pizza without trouble. I could eat two on a good day, but that's not the point. 

I found this to be one of the better frozen pizzas out there, but I still say you should save your pizza for the fresh ones. I mean, these things are not all that good for you.

I eat frozen pizza all the time, and look at me. I'm a blimp.

Friday, April 8, 2022

Albertson's Ready Meals Spice Pepper Turkey & Pepper Jack Cheese Sandwich


When you keep forgetting your lunch and are on your way to work you may stop at your local Alberston's and grab a Albertson's Ready Meals Spice Pepper Turkey & Pepper Jack Cheese  Sandwich. These things are made with that cheesecake factory bread they sell. 

I think these are better for you than a hamburger and run about half as much as a fast food meal. Then again, these are not as satisfying and they don't come with a drink. Still, if you need something fast and that will last in the refrigerator at work, these will do nicely.  

Thursday, April 7, 2022

Hostess Donettes Strawberry Cheesecake

Hostess Donettes Strawberry Cheesecake sound like the kind of thing a fat dude like me would be obsessed with. Sadly, what sounds like a rapturous experience in food is little more than a normal pastry. I was not impressed with these.

They were fine, sure, but had too little flavor to be worth eating and the "Cheesecake" name is in no way earned. I will say they have strawberry flavor.  

If you're a big fat dude like me you should keep clear of these, if you're Millie Bobby Brown thin then you should eat these and a whole lot more because you're too skinny.
 

Wednesday, April 6, 2022

JT's Ice Cream Vanilla Fudge


 JT's Ice Cream Vanilla Fudge comes in a pack small enough for single people. Yeah, that's a plus for me because I'm fat and want to try new ice creams.

After that, it is just ice cream. Ice cream is always good. 

Tuesday, April 5, 2022

Brach's Speckled Jelly Bird Eggs

Nothing says rebirth of a god like jelly beans and Brach's Speckled Jelly Bird Eggs taste just like the beans I got as a kid. This is to say they are cheap and should never be eaten.

Let's be clear, I'm Jewish and never did care for pagan rituals like Easter and Christmas. In addition, I am a ridiculous blob of a man at four hundred and fifteen pounds. That said, I shouldn't eat jelly beans or jelly bird eggs or jelly anything for that matter. 

These are the candies that get left for last and get eaten during Saturday cartoons. If your kids are thin then these are find, but if they're fat like I am then it's best to leave these at the store.

Monday, April 4, 2022

Smithfield Premium Sausage Hometown Original


 Smithfield Premium Sausage Hometown Original is a salty sausage that has little flavor past the salt. Only you can say if that is a good or bad thing but past that it gets the job done. 

Then again, I made it into a kind of  shepherd's pie and had it almost every day for a week and didn't get tired of it. Not bad really.

Sunday, April 3, 2022

Paqui Mucho Nacho Cheese Tortilla Chips


 Paqui Mucho Nacho Cheese Tortilla Chips are discount Doritos. Well, it's about time that they had competition and I have to say, well, okay, I shouldn't have Doritos and I shouldn't have this, because I'm a big fat dude and they are not good for me. 

These are not as good as Doritos, but they are not bad.

Saturday, April 2, 2022

Bubly Sparkling Water Mango

 

Bubly Sparkling Water Mango has enough mango to make it worth drinking for mango loving people. I can't say that mango has ever been a big thing for me, but I can drink this stuff all day. It's a lot better than getting dehydrated so this is an unoffensive flavor.

In the hot summer this is a great thing to have around because soda will kill that summer body faster than you think. All in all, I'd get this again. 

Friday, April 1, 2022

Farmer John Polska Kielbasa


 Farmer John Polska Kielbasa is, well, about what one would expect from this kind of product. You buy it, you cook it, you eat it. It tastes good, but it's what one would call normal. 

It is so hard for me to review normal things. What do you say about them? Normal is what no one wants to really know about. Normal is the part of life that gets forgotten by history. This is normal.