Annie's Classic Shells & Cheese with Hidden Veggies

 Annie's Classic Shells & Cheese with Hidden Veggies is a microwave side dish that can go with most meals. A variant on good old mac and cheese but made for a world where people just shove crap in their face all day.

This is a better for you alternative that is at least as good as some of the bad for you brands out there. It's not as rich as it could be but then rich food made me into what I am today...a four hundred pound blob.

Danish Choice Apricot Preserves

 Danish Choice Apricot Preserves were the most interesting thing I could find at the store in terms of a fruit spread and I have loads of almond butter to review. 

Well, I don't eat preserves often enough to really give you an idea as to what these are. They have a pleasant flavor and no odd bits to make your mouth go "what am I eating". Jelly is made from juice, jam is made from fruit, and preserves should have large chunks of fruit in them.

Well, this is one smooth preserve in that case. Not bad at all. 

Old El Paso Soft Tortilla Bowl Cheese

 Old El Paso Soft Tortilla Bowl Cheese are a disappointment in that they have very little flavor. Tortilla Bowls made with these will still be tortilla bowls and be totally kickin' but the bowl itself will not taste like cheese.

McDonald’s Menu Hacks Crunchy Double

McDonald’s Menu Hacks Crunchy Double is a hamburger with nuggets. I can't really call them chicken nuggets, but nuggets with  bbq  sauce. Without the sauce the whole thing is too dry, and with the sauce the whole thing will kill you with salt. 

I had to have two of these things, because I needed one for the video and one for my blog. Afterwards, I felt rather full and wanted to have a nap. 

This isn't the best idea, but it isn't the worst idea. If you have a group and want your McBurger to be a little more hefty then this will work. It's three nuggets to the burger so a six piece will fill this out for two people. 

All things considered, not that great.
 

Whole Foods Market Delighted By Snickerdoodle Dessert Hummus

 Coming from Whole Foods Market this 'Delighted By Snickerdoodle Dessert Hummus' will likely be way too expensive for most people. I mean, I used to take my brother to whole foods and he was like "Another trip to whole paycheck!" I never really got anything there myself. 

Anyway, it tastes nothing like hummus, a good amount like cookie dough and is rather good. I would not get it again because I would have no idea what to do with it, but I did like the stuff. 

Grekko Early Harvest Halkidiki Olives Pitted

 Boasting of a strong vinegar flavor, Grekko Early Harvest Halkidiki Pitted Olives will stand out in anything you put them in like a salad or a taco bowl. These are some really nice olives to be honest which is why I will probably not buy them again, because I like the old simple black olives. 

I honestly think these are more for drinks than normal eating but I have never had a drink with an olive in it and I'm not keen to start right now.

Sandra's Antibiotic Free Chicken with Kale & Pepperjack

 Sandra's Antibiotic Free Chicken with Kale & Pepperjack is one of those swanky kinds of things that taste great but kind of feel off. I mean, they aren't very hot, but I can taste the heat when I eat them. Once you let them cool you can grab them and eat them without spilling too much.

All and all, I would buy these again. Good stuff.

Popcornopolis Americorn Popcorn

 Popcornopolis Americorn Popcorn is caramel corn in red, white, and blue. It gives you pooh in green. This gluten free non GMO product tastes great but will kill you, or at very least, give you diabetes. 

It really tastes good, but remember, not for all the time.

Just Desserts San Fransisco Red Velvet Cake

 Just Desserts San Fransisco Red Velvet Cake is a little dry and needs more icing. Red Velvet is just another word for chocolate if you don't add the right icing.  

Are these bad? No, I love to sip coffee and have one of these on the few cold mornings that global warming hasn't taken away from me. They just could be better.

Rockstar Recovery Orange

Rockstar Recovery Orange is a hangover cure that I wouldn't know much about, because I never have hangovers. I don't drink too much so I don't get them. 

I have to say this reminds me of tang and has a really retro feel. Orange out of a lab kind of flavor. So, if you want to stay up all night and play astronaut this stuff is right for you. 
 

Maxwell House Iced Coffee Black

 In the world of ice coffee you should decide what your coffee tastes like, and no one knows that like Maxwell House with there Black Iced Coffee. This is nothing more or less than a can of brewed dark coffee with a slightly bitter flavor waiting for you to put it in whatever you like. I have to say this is a great idea. Be the boss of your coffee, and make this stuff what you want.

Hostess Iced Lemon CupCakes

 With a strong flavor of lemon Hostess Iced Lemon CupCakes go well with coffee. In fact I have an official lemon taster who said that these are very good before he flips me the bird and says I'm making him fat.  

The point is my friends are odd people. 

These get a thumbs up from lemon lovers and an okay from me. 

Sun Topics Dragon Fruit Nectar

 Sun Topics Dragon Fruit Nectar is one product that called to me. I mean, it has dragon in the name! It's also a lot like punch. I have to say that I'm not a big juice drinker so this is not a big thing for me, but it is good enough that I would get it again.

It's more a conversation piece then anything else. Tastes great, gets guests talking, good for a party.

Café Sarks Organic Espresso Roast

 

Café Sarks Organic Espresso Roast is a dark rich coffee free of bitterness and full of the flavors I love in coffee. Strong as an oxen it will get me through a hard night of work. I have to say I love this stuff. Would buy again.

Nestle Toll House Valentine Chocolate Chip Cookie dough

 Nestle Toll House Valentine Chocolate Chip Cookie dough was all over the place last year. I think this is for moms and sad lonely people who don't know much about romance. The red and pink candy hearts make them a step down from normal chocolate chip cookies.

Valentines day is a day we buy things we shouldn't and get fat. Most holidays are, and I never thought much of it, but if you want to show a loved one you care about them I don't think this is the way. I gave my mother breakfast in bed, for example, but for most of us men we should just do the dishes.

Elmer Chocolate Valentine's Day Rose Bouquet Design Heart Shaped, 6 Ounce Chocolate Gift Box

 Elmer Chocolate Valentine's Day Rose Bouquet Design Heart Shaped, 6 Ounce Chocolate Gift Box is a way of saying "I love me, so I got me something for Valentine's". This is a box of rich soft centered chocolate that will go down slow and leave your mouth wanting some coffee or milk. 

I wouldn't go giving these out because most folks know that hard centered chocolate is the real good stuff. Still, this is rich and indulgent and not for fat people like me. 

Nerf Friendship Exchange Hearts with Candy

 

Hello kids, are you insecure in your sexuality? Does the idea of giving out Valentine's Day candy to a class with other boys in it make you itch in funny places? Then I have the answer for you: Nerf Friendship Exchange Hearts with Candy. Yes, Nerf offers these plastic hearts with almost no candy in them whatsoever and even in the wrong colors for Valentine's Day. No one will think you love them when you hand out this chalky almost candies to your class on V-Day. Forget writing your classmates names on these things, because the from and to are in plastic, and it will just wipe off anyway. 

Yes, keep up that image of your manhood before ultimately engaging in gay experiments later in life with these "I totally don't think about this day" candies from Nerf.

McDonald's Hash Brown McMuffin

McDonald's has come up with a way to make you play with your food. The least annoying selection in that menu is the Hash Brown McMuffin. This is a hash brown and a sausage egg McMuffin that you put together to make one food item. They don't put it together for you, you do it yourself. 

Please do not assemble this wild driving.  

This is a heftier sandwich than just a McMuffin, but the hash brown overwhelms the sausage and leaves you with less of an experience. I don't think putting these things together makes them better than the sum of their parts, but I do think if you eat a good deal of McDonald's then this is a change that is worth trying. 
 

Sensible Portions Garden Veggie Chips Valentine Hearts Sea Salt

 Garden Veggie Chips Mini Hearts are another of those bad ideas for valentine's day. I mean, look at where you need to write the from and to and think what it would do to the chips within to put names on them. 

These do taste like normal Garden Veggie Chips, and they make a good pallet cleanser for when you get too much sugar and can't taste it any more. I would not give these out to class or coworkers, but if you find them on sale like I did they aren't bad. 

Now the whole "sensible portions" idea means you eat more bags and make more trash. You want sensible eat an apple.

 

Hostess Dark Chocolate Raspberry Cup Cakes

 Hostess Dark Chocolate Raspberry Cup Cakes feel both slightly suggestive and racist. I think that's what Nicki Minaj named her baby tunnel. "Time for you to eat that Dark Chocolate Raspberry" The cup cakes aren't that great and I'd like to see you fill out that bit on the top with a ball point pen. 

All in all, Meh.  

If  you know a woman who is down to earth and would like these they would make a great gift. Otherwise, I'd keep clear. 

M&M's Milk Chocolate Popcorn

M&M's Milk Chocolate Popcorn was on shelves last October and confusingly has no corn and is made with lab grown flavors. It does smell like popcorn but that's where the similarities end. 

I have to say these are okay, you should try them just to do so, but not as good as normal M&M's Milk Chocolate. This is a gimmick to get you to buy more and you should only really do that if they are on sale.
 

Dove Hearts Milk Chocolate and Dark Chocolate Swirl

Some of us like milk chocolate and some like dark. The rest of us just want more chocolate and that is were Dove Hearts Milk Chocolate and Dark Chocolate Swirl come in. These live in the mid ground between the two and have a stronger chocolate flavor. Needless to say they are delicious, and I shouldn't have them because I'm fat.

Helper Mac & Cheese Bold Cheesy Pizza

 In the world of food everyone is trying to make things as good as pizza and, in the case of Helper Mac & Cheese Bold Cheesy Pizza, they are failing. I can't say I have every had something pizza flavored that is as good as the real deal but this is just not even as good as cheesy mac. 

This cup of disappointment at least hides the pizza bit like it's ashamed of it self but you would never taste this and say "hmmm, it's kind of like pizza"

Oui by Yoplait Layered Desserts Cherry Cheesecake

At two hundred and ninety Calories Oui by Yoplait Layered Desserts Cherry Cheesecake tastes like heaven on a spoon. Let's just remember that that is a lot of Calories. They taste so good but are so bad for me. There are cans of soda that are half the Calories of one of those little cups. 

If I see more flavors of these I will so get them, but if I'm not eating them for my blog then I should never have them. I hate being fat. 

Oroweat Oatnut Bread

Oroweat Oatnut Bread is the not so hippy food that started out as hippy food before you could get the sprouted grain stuff. Better for you than white, but still not as soft, this stuff is fine and dandy. 

I always got white bread as a kid because I liked soft bread. Now I'm told soft bread is bad for me, and I need to eat the stuff that tastes like sand. 
 

The Conqueror Challenge Great Wall Virtual Challenge

 The Conqueror Challenge 'Great Wall Virtual Challenge' has two different versions. They have the long way and the short way for those of you who walk or ride a bike. 

To be honest, who cares, dragon! Yeah, this one was a cool dragon on it and it's gold and red. So, in the world of cool, this is the coolest Conqueror medal they've had so far.

Pasta Bellezza Five Cheese Tortellini

 You'd think Pasta Bellezza Five Cheese Tortellini would be more cheesy but it's mild and dependent on the sauce you use with it for flavor. These are about as good as any tortellini I have had, but that's why I will just buy what is on sale next time I want tortellini.

Organic Sunshine Burgers

 I don't know what sunshine should taste like, but it is not these rather dry Organic Sunshine Burgers. They don't really taste or smell like beef but they would be fine with enough condiments. A world with less beef is a world with fewer hot days so I'm all for cutting back but this just won't do.

Hormel Compleats Chicken Alfredo

 Hormel Compleats Chicken Alfredo is not very complete in terms of nutrition. You can eat them for a time and survive but you can't really live off them for long without gaining weight and feeling sick. 

This rather bland meal is something that can keep you going for a time if you are surviving a natural disaster and need ready made food. However, it will not provide what the body needs to stay healthy. 

I ordered a box of these and was surprised to see it advertised as a disaster food.  Well, on the up side no preparation needed. On the down side bland and not good for you. 

I like these and would take them for lunch at work but would also need vitamins if I ate them for a long time.