Monster Juice Exotic Aussie Style Lemonade

Monster Juice Exotic Aussie Style Lemonade has one of those long names that I can’t stand. Why not just call it Monster Aussie Lemonade? Do I need to know that it has juice in it from the name? 

Anyway, stuff reminds me of Argentinean pineapple. It has that tartness that I would expect with the pine apple but not as much of the lemon flavor I was expecting. 

To be honest I wouldn’t mind a case of these sitting around because I would drink the heck out of them. That would mean that it’s a good thing I don’t have a case of them, because I would drink too many. 

 

Success Import Bread Banana

In the world of "well, this is food" we have the Success Import Bread Banana. It is a bread that tastes mildly of banana. I mean, a real banana has more flavor to it.

There is filling but so little of it that it adds almost nothing but calories. These are a lot more phone to see then eat. I won't have trouble finishing them but I won't get more.  
 

Fresca Zero Sugar Grapefruit Citrus Slurpee

Fresca Zero Sugar Grapefruit Citrus Slurpee is now available at 7-Eleven. I found it to be light and refreshing. Not has heavy as the flavors I normally get. With the Heatwaves hitting the golden state this is a low calorie way to cool off.

I should have gotten a larger one. It didn't taste at all like artificial sweetener.

  
 

Carl's Jr. Waffle Fries

When did Carl’s Jr. start calling them Waffle fries? They were crisscut fries back in the day. Anyway, these are  crisscut fries, but I don’t know if there is any legal definition of that so waffle is a good enough name.

In any case, Carl’s has some okay fries to start with and the Waffle Fries are a step up but not as filling. I think you get less potato in the deal. I’d say that one big advantage of these is that being larger you’re not going to lose them in your car as easily.

I lose way too much fast food in my car. I need to have that thing cleaned.

 

Bon Appetit Cream Cheese Cake

 For the man with no time there is the Bon Appetit Cream Cheese Cake which I got at 7-Eleven. It is nothing like a cheesecake. It is, from what I gather, a cake made with cream cheese. So it is more cake than anything else and a heavy cake at that.

It has a mild tartness to it, which I would have to say makes it interesting, but I will admit that the crumble on top can be a bit of a mess.

All and all, great to have with coffee. 

Keebler Original Export Sodas

 Keebler Original Export Sodas are made to last and be exported for long expeditions. You have them with soup and cold cuts or whatever can be preserved. 

I'm not going to lie, I got them because I want to use that tin for keeping coffee stuff at work. 

Look, these are saltine crackers. They may last linger or be a bit more dry, but they are still saltine crackers. 

I think these are more fun then box saltines, and I will get them again.   

Carl's Jr. French Toast Dips

 There being no legal definition of French Toast you can call these Carl's Jr French Toast Dips. Technically, this would be soldier cut fried bread and not french toast. It does not look to be dipped in egg at all.

To call these bad would be unjust, I can't say they're bad, they just feel like they should be dipped in egg to be called French Toast. 

I wouldn't get this again, but it was okay. 

Taffy Town Orange Cream

 You’d think a whale of a man like me would know Taffy Town, would be known in Taffy Town, and would have an apartment there where they always say “good to see you,” when I show up. I still would have thought it would have been carrot or carrot cake taffy in that carrot shaped box.

It was Orange Cream taffy. I would say it had a sharp orange flavor and was mildly sweet. I wouldn’t say it was great, but it was good taffy.

Carl's Jr. Diablo Habanero Ranch

 Carl's Jr. Diablo Habanero Ranch is kind of what McDonald's was going for with their buffalo ranch only with more heat. The combination of hot sauces with the cooling ranch permits less lingering and building of flavors.

I would say the flavor or ranch is kind of lost. I wouldn't call it life changing. I mean, I like the stuff but it's no something I'd miss if it was gone. 

7 Select Glazed Honey Bun

7 Select Glazed Honey Buns tastes just like Hostess. They probably are Hostess but in a branded bag for Seven Eleven. To be fair, I knew that when I got them but I'm working long days and just needed to review something.

These are sticky, best with coffee, and to be had in moderation. There are better things to be had at the gas station but these are just fine.  

Superior on Main Watermelon Cookies

Superior on Main Watermelon Cookies are surprisingly good for what they are. This is the kind of item that is so good I went back and got more. Love these things but they are so bad for me. I should never eat these again but they really taste great, have a great mouth feel, and are likely granted to contain no actual food.

 

King Leo Candy Fruit Puffs

King Leo Candy Fruit Puffs have this odd kind of texture that makes them brake up in your mouth. I don’t care for their flavor. I think it’s a little too strong an lacking in sweetness.

These look like old time candy but are nothing of the sort. I think they are freeze dried and puffed out.

I would call these an old people candy for folks who have little to do left in life but taste the sugar and watch old TV shows.

 

Carl's Jr. Chicken Western Bacon Sandwich

One of the facts of life is that chicken coasts less than beef in the United States and so Carl's has given us the Carl's Jr. Chicken Western Bacon Sandwich to offer up a meal at a better price. They have failed but it was a good effort.

First off, the shape of this chicken isn't all that great for sandwiches. Really, it fits poorly. I was left with two bites of sandwich without chicken. 

Second, the chicken isn't all that great. I mean, it was okay but I wouldn't have thought it was half as good as the burger. 

This was okay, I wouldn't say great, but it was okay.  

7-Eleven Buffalo Chicken Roller

 Chickens do not have dicks... Ducks do, and I'm asking myself why I know this. Anyway these  7-Eleven Buffalo Chicken Roller look both like a dog turd and some how a chicken dick with doesn't exist. They are never as hot as they really should be but have a lingering buffalo flavor that can get on hour hands. 

I think these would be good if you put them in an air fryer, but as they are they are the Twinkies of meat.  

Jack in the Box Mint Twisted Soda 2025

Last year I tried Jack in the Box Mint Twisted Soda, and I think Jack was trying to insult St. Patrick. I never got that mint and St. Patrick’s Day business, and I never will, but that’s what the world says is a thing and so it is a thing I guess.

Anyway, this was mint and lemon lime soda. It really didn’t go well together, and the milk aspects of the drink I felt did it no service.

I wouldn’t get this again and I wish I could erase it from my memory.

 

JOLT Root Beer Energy Drink

I never got to try Jolt as a kid. I saw it a few times in stores and wanted to try it but never got around to it. Then on a wim I ordered root beer flavored Jolt which was not a thing when I was a kid. 

To be dead honest, it's not bad. It's not as good as real root beer but it gets the job done. It has no head, which is a bad thing, but it tastes okay and keeps me going on the long shifts. 
 

7-Eleven Ultimate Pepperoni

 7-Eleven must have some big harry donkey nuts to call this Ultimate Pepperoni. It's hard to screw up pizza and this isn't screwed up but I would still say as pizza goes it's bottom tear at best.

I didn't expect it to be as good as the frozen pizza I eat at home and it wasn't. Sad, stale, and needing cheese, I still eat this on long shifts at work because I can grab it and keep it in a bag.  

This skirts the boundaries of what can be called food.  

Albanese 12 Flavor Gummi Cubs

I guess gummi Bears is under copyright so here are the, um, high end knock off Albanese 12 Flavor Gummi Cubs. I don’t know what I really think of these. I have had better gummi concoctions than this but why are people just obsessed with bears?

Odd thing being that these came in an Easter basket, well, Easter thing anyway. What to bears have to do with Easter? About as much as bunnies have to do with Jesus I guess.