Jerry the McDonald's Happy Meal Toy

So Jerry over here looks just like I felt when I saw him and asked myself what kind of a toy is this. It looks like a sex toy for a little person. I have to admit that I don't get what a kid would see in this but I was never a big fan of the Despicable Me movies.
 

McDonald's Happy Meal Toy Tails 2

 This thing is a McDonald's Happy Meal Toy. Tails 2 I think. I have no idea really but it was in my happy meal last night. Don't look at me like that, I write a blog about stuff like this. 

Anyway, if you're not a sonic fan this thing looks rather silly and I first thought it was a Pokémon I wasn't familiar with. I have to admit that I don't think this is cool but I don't know much about these kinds of things. 

 

Carl's Jr. Star Pals Subway Surfers Jake

So, I think this is Jake from the 'Subway Surfers' mobile game, and you can pick him up in a 'Star Pals' meal at Carl's Jr. This little dill weed goes about making life hard for an honest security guard who is just trying to do is job.

I watched the commercials for this crud, and they show some 'Sonic the Hedge Hog' style coin collecting mixed in with spray painting and may be more property destruction. Jake looks like a bad influence on children teaching them that doing the wrong thing is just expressing yourself. 

He is immortalized in this half tail attempt at making a toy. The whole thing is a sticker on a bit of plastic with a spring launcher to make it flop forward. 

Carl, buddy, you got to do better than this.
 

Disney 50th Anniversary Hei Hei McDonald's Happy Meal Toy

 Why you would want to give a rooster ecstasy I don't know, but here is Hei Hei the Disney 50th Anniversary McDonald's Happy Meal Toy. Then again, the more you think about Disney movies the worse they get. I haven't seen whatever movie this is from, but if I killed at ate this pile of stupid I figure it would give me bad dreams. then again, thing is a toy so it would give me toy poops. 

At least the chickens aren't as smart as the ducks. You watch Disney and you should become a vegetarian because all animals talk. Then again, I guess some of the plants do as well.

Carl's Jr. Robot Chicken Toy

 Carl's Jr. had toys and one of them is this Robot Chicken from Adult Swim. The thing about this is that Robot Chicken is not a toy meant for children and the show is also not meant for children so this ugly cybernetic foul is not going to tickle a kids fancy. 

If you let your child watch Robot Chicken you should be arrested for child abuse because that program is super violent and there is too much animal abuse.  

Otherwise, cool toy.

Disney 50th Anniversary Happy Meal Toy Sebastian

 We all remember the singing crab from Disney's 'The Little Mermaid' and this 50th Anniversary Happy Meal Toy Sebastian may bring that smile back to your face. 

I don't much care for this idea, because if I eat crab I don't want to think about it singing and dancing. Stop making my food talk, Disney!

McDonald's Happy Meal Toy Milton Bradley Monopoly

I loved Happy Meal toys as a kid and I'm even now collecting toys to go to an orphanage in Mexico so I figured it would be a good fit for me to review one of these things. What you get with this toy is an anthropomorphic Milton Bradley Monopoly box with a near impossible to play simplified game inside. 

The worst part about it is that the board will not sit flat. You could fix this by setting a book on it for a few hours, but then you couldn't get it back in the box without bending it again. Then there's the fact that you have all kinds of little paper parts that will get lost. 

 

The box is big enough to fit better quality playing parts but everything is just made of paper. If this is a toy to put on the shelf and show that you love Monopoly then it's a good little talking peace to have. As for kids playing with it, I call this a fail. There is too much to get lost, too much to make a mess with, and I'm not sure the game is all that playable.